Purpose Driven Life

First of all, i would like to acknowledge that I found the picture from Google images. Hopefully, there is no copyright infringement..Second of all, I have the book, and it makes a lot of sense..

anyway, the purpose of my post with this title is to note the fact that my life has changed quite a bit, and now like, every action i take or think about taking, the 1st question i ask in my head is "what is the reason behind it?" quite a pragmatic thought..but it is how i think nowadays..for example, i dont go to theme parks because I find that the reasoning for theme parks are absolutely a waste of time, especially for me, because there is no point in thrills..i mean, what does it do for u? makes you feel high, and then? But yea, you can also say the same thing about music, "whats the point?" so yea, now the questions i ask are basically directed at me, so I don't get a thrill out of theme parks, because I don't see the point behind it, but i do not generalise my opinion about theme parks to ppl who do enjoy going to them..

but yea, i've come to realise that life is too short to be doing things for urself..because that is pointless..i mean, it is important to look after ourselves once in a while, but if we just keep doing things for ourselves, it is just pointless..its quite hard to explain it anymore than that..i guess it all comes back to "why has God created us?" and it is explained in the Bible, to worship Him and to adore Him, as He has adored us..

anyway yea, some of you may be thinking there is A HUGE flaw in the reason mentioned above, n that is that God exists..well, IF i wanted to argue from that perspective, I would still say that life is too short to be spending our time wasting it on ourselves..mostly because, i would say i have an extremely high level of altruism (the character of wanting to do good deeds), therefore based of purely scientific analysis, my high level of altruism (or even my phlegmatic personality) explains that I want to use up my time doing something better in my life..

anyway, from a more corporate point of view, just say there is procedures for a worker has to go through in order to do his job and that would be, A) gathering all the stones that he finds B) bringing them back C) seperating ALL the stones D) catergorising ALL the stones E) throwing out all the non-precious stones then continue..so step D seems quite pointless, where all the stones are being catergorised, and what the company is looking for is just precious stones..so yea, swapping step E with D makes the work a whole lot simpler rite?

anyway, that was a bad example but the point is still there..i guess now what i've been doing is that i'm always trying to find a reason why in everything that we do..

so yea, thats that..hope it makes sense..somehow i have this sneaky suspicion that i've already done up a post like that..hmm..

Cheers and God Bless

Dying Breaths of an Inactive Blog ..

yea, it has been inactive, mostly because of the extremely busy nature that i have been living..which actually hasnt been that busy..but yea, havent really found the mood, and its like, dont really have the inspiration to blog anymore, i mean, there is so much to do, and by blogging, i dont think i am really making much of a difference..but it has really been great to release my inner thoughts..

Anyway, if i were to describe my holidays in malaysia (up to this point) in just 1 word, it would be frustration..basically, i am just oh, so frustrated with the way things are being done here, be it family, church, friends, whatever..i mean, so much is expected of me, and the worse part is i have allowed all these expectations affected me..which of course i need to keep reminding myself that God is the one in control, and He has nothing more expected of me but to be an obedient child..so yea, lost sight of that..but yea, part of the frustration is that all my thoughts that are in my mind, i cant seem to share it with anyone, who would be able to understand the problems..the ppl who use to be able to listen are either away, busy with their own life, or changed..

another reason for this frustration is that i've always had this fear that nobody cares about me, and i've always tried to find ways of giving myself and others reasons to care about me, like i've always thought i am inadequate, so that people who look out for me..and well, ppl also always say, "u need to give if u wanna get", and well, ive been giving for quite a long time..so yea, pretty much my worst fears have come true..ppl i thought who actually cared about me dont..but oh well, life goes on, people are hungry and starving in the world, and the love of Jesus is still kept a secret to people of the world..

dont get me wrong, its not that my entire time here has been absolutely bad, i've had really wonderful times too, and im really glad to have a chance to meet up with friends and brothers..re-live the old days and plan for new ones..so here is to all the friends and brothers who have been there for me..and to those of you who "don't care" about me, it's ok, i mean i get it, you are busy, or have other things to do in ur life, i really totally get it..i mean, yes i am angry at the fact that little/no effort has been put into looking out or even looking for me, but i get that i am being quite selfish, and i should give you guys the benefit of the doubt..so i truly mean it when i say, it's ok..so yea, if ur sorry, i forgive u, but if ur not, then please forgive me..

Moral of the story: Never trust a quiet/introverted guy..you just don't know what is going on inside his head..

Cheers and God Bless..

Story of my Life...

K, this post is more of a ranting than my usual stuff..so yea..so here it goes..there is actually only a few things in life that I REALLY enjoy..like seriously few things..one of which would be futsal..like, thats one of the few things that i really find hard saying no to..SO one year over in australia, and the only thing that I really ever looked forward to when i came home would be, of course, to play futsal..so, yea, roughly 3 months ago, i decided to go play futsal with friends in aussieland, and from that game, i managed to injure my knee (of which i think it is one of my ligaments) and so i didnt play ANY sports until i came home, because i thought it would go away..in which it kinda did..

so yea, when i came home, i didnt really play futsal until like, 29th of Dec..so i was all geared up for that, until on the 28th of Dec, i was helping to move a podium off the stage in church, upon which i managed to hit my knee right at the corner of the podium (which is made of solid wood) and pretty much couldn't use my knee at all for that whole day..HOWEVER, that really didnt stop me, as i decided to go out and buy a knee guard so that i can still play..anyway..it did help, but now i cant really play that much futsal or any kind of sport too much, because it does hurt after awhile..

so yea..its like, one of the things that i was really looking forward to do back in malaysia, is something of which i cant do that often anymore..probably will go see a doctor soon to check out what is wrong with it..but yea, it really sucks..

k, maybe this will help you get an idea of why it sucks quite a lot for me (for those of u who dont think this is a big deal) k, so i would say my time is broken up into a few stuff, stuff i need to do, stuff i wanna do, and stuff others need me to do..so yea, in stuff i WANNA do, i usually use that time to hang out with my friends, and pretty much do stuff that everyone wants to do..which would include going to a CC, watching a movie, etc..however, going to a CC is not my thing, as in i dont really enjoy it (like seriously enjoy it) but i am willing to do it cuz i like the interactions that is exchanged..so i would say that in my time for stuff i WANNA do, i would say it would be 80% of the time i am doing stuff that others wanna do..and i pretty much get 20% of the time to just do stuff that i wanna do..and NOW even with that 20%, i cant seem to use it now thanks to my stupid injured knee..

im not complaining that im using up 80% (which by the way is a statistic to exaggerate my point) to do stuff that others wanna do, but im complaining of the fact that my knee is injured, so i cant even fully utilise my 20%..haiz..

Not my will but Yours be done...

Cheers and God Bless